Just an old ficlet I digged up

[liliaeth]

Title: Hate
Author: Lore
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: Gen
Summary: Buffy's thoughts on Spike
Pairing: B/S
notes: written during season six">



I hate him.
I hate his bleach blond hair, the way it catches the light, the way it
curls when he stops trying … When he's just …
I hate those blue eyes of his, that look just freaks me out. So
innocent, yet so dangerous because of it. I hate that hurt look in
those eyes as he watches me when I try so hard to push him away.
Oh God I hate how he stays, I hate his hand touching me when I need
him … not. I never need him, never ever ever.

I hate the way he talks to my sister, like she matters to him. The
way he notices her even when I'm too busy hiding behind walls to
really care.

I hate the way he just stands there and takes all the crap I throw at
him, hurting me with little more than words, never leaving, never.

I hate the way I can fight with him. The way he can stand up to me
and make me look at things. I hate the way he protects my friends.

I hate him.
Because … because if I don't then … then I'll love him.
Every annoying, aggravating inch of him.
And that scares me.
So God I hate him.
I hate him so much.

Comments

[spikesbint.livejournal.com]

That was really good, I think although she was saying that she hated him, she really meant that she loved him, it was just easier to call it hate.

Angela

[buffyx.livejournal.com]

Awww, heartbreaking, but really, really good. Great insight into what Buffy would be feeling at that time.

[bogwitch.livejournal.com]

I enjoyed that. Seems to encapsulate the relationship to me.